What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize