i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
