Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
