I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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