The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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