just tell him i said nine months
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
