We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
