I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
