Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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