Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
