Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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