Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
