He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
