i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
