can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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