we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
