apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
