my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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