ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
