I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
