We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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