You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
