bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Small penises have feelings too.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
