it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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