Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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