I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
