I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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