I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
This show inspires me to have sex in space
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
