if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
