I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
