Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
