they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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