i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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