I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
