just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
