what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
