Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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