is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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