I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
