Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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