Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
