Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
