We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
