You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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