he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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