And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
