Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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