I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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