Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
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