Soap is not a condiment
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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